Justice Department Protects Oversight From Congress
President Donald Trump ordered the Justice Department to protect congressional oversight Tuesday by investigating Democrats who plan to conduct congressional oversight, shielding the Constitution from the reckless use of its own provisions. The emergency began when Democrats announced that winning control of Congress might be followed by hearings into administration conduct, a radical interpretation of elections under which voters expect the winners to perform the jobs listed on the ballot.
Rep. Robert Garcia advised administration officials to “lawyer up,” a Washington expression meaning “retain legal counsel” and, under the White House’s new translation, “attempt to overthrow the republic with binders.” Trump responded by calling Democrats extortionists and clarifying that oversight is legitimate only when directed at people who are not Donald Trump. “Nobody has ever defended oversight like me, and everybody knows oversight means I oversee Congress while Congress respects my privacy,” Trump said. “If they ask me questions, that is not oversight. That is a very serious crime against accountability.”
Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche declined to rule out prosecutions, confirming the department’s position that a lawful congressional inquiry can become unlawful the moment it produces a question the president finds emotionally inconvenient. Under the emerging doctrine, subpoenas remain constitutional unless delivered to Republicans, donors, administration officials, relatives, business partners, golfing companions or anyone visible in the background of a photograph taken at Mar-a-Lago. Document requests will likewise be permitted, provided they seek documents that do not exist, contain no information and can be surrendered without anyone reading them.
House Democratic leader Hakeem Jeffries and Senate Democratic leader Chuck Schumer are also expected to endanger democracy by scheduling hearings, requesting records and committing other procedural atrocities traditionally associated with representative government. The Justice Department investigation will determine whether Democrats conspired to weaponize Congress by winning an election and then attempting to exercise powers explicitly assigned to Congress. If found responsible, lawmakers could face Washington’s gravest penalty: an investigation by officials furious that investigations exist. Congressional oversight is therefore fully protected, provided Congress never uses it.
* None of the quotes in this article were spoken by an actual person. More info.