Justice Department Declares California Ballots Fraudulent Until Approved

The Justice Department announced a streamlined standard for election integrity under which every California mail ballot is presumed fraudulent until federal officials locate it on a spreadsheet, distrust the spreadsheet and issue a warning about the ballot anyway. The department demanded that California segregate ballots linked to more than 20,000 people it described as “likely noncitizens,” although state officials found that many of the names were inactive, canceled, duplicated or absent from the voter rolls. The method allows the government to identify illegal votes before establishing that the voters exist, eliminating the procedural burden formerly known as evidence.

A federal appeals court rejected the administration’s request Friday, while another judge barred officials from threatening election workers who process the ballots. Justice Department lawyers treated both defeats as confirmation that activist judges were obstructing the president’s constitutional authority to become suspicious whenever California opens an envelope. Under the administration’s legal theory, adverse rulings do not weaken a case; they demonstrate that the judiciary has joined the conspiracy described in the case.

“These are very illegal ballots, maybe the most illegal ballots ever mailed, and some of these people were not even registered, which proves they registered illegally,” Donald Trump said, summarizing the department’s evidence before it could be contaminated by verification. California Secretary of State Shirley Weber has resisted the federal demand, adhering to the obsolete view that eligible voters should not lose their ballots merely because a database produced a nervous feeling in Washington.

Federal prosecutor Bill Essayli warned that election officials could face “legal jeopardy” for knowingly processing a noncitizen’s ballot. The department has modernized the definition of “knowingly” to include receiving an email, hearing that an email exists or working in a building where someone may eventually print the email. Administration officials emphasized that the operation is not voter suppression but voter protection, specifically protection from the danger that votes might be counted before Trump decides whether he approves of them. A California ballot is therefore fraudulent until Donald Trump likes the result.

* None of the quotes in this article were spoken by an actual person. More info.