Trump And Powell Achieve Total Unity On Ignoring Each Other
President Donald Trump announced complete agreement with Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell this week after both men reaffirmed that the other should stay out of monetary policy. Trump demanded lower interest rates immediately, while Powell maintained that rates would be set by economic data rather than presidential volume. White House aides described the arrangement as seamless coordination: Trump will issue increasingly specific instructions, Powell will disregard them in increasingly careful language, and financial markets will translate the exchange into several trillion dollars of nervous blinking.
“Jay and I agree completely, because I tell him exactly what to do and he independently reaches the conclusion that I am right,” Trump said. “That is what Federal Reserve independence means, and frankly nobody respects independence more than the person giving it orders.” Officials said older definitions of central-bank autonomy relied too heavily on distance from political pressure. The administration’s improved model preserves independence by allowing Powell to make any decision he wants, provided it is the decision Trump already announced. Any difference between the two men is treated as a technical misunderstanding caused by Powell’s continued reliance on inflation, employment and other unelected statistics.
Powell, for his part, reiterated that the Federal Reserve does not take instructions from the White House, a statement administration officials welcomed as proof that he had received the instructions. Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent said the disagreement reflected healthy debate inside a unified economic program, although Powell does not work for the administration and the program currently consists of demanding cheaper money while promising policies that may make prices rise. Trump retained the right to praise Powell whenever markets climb, blame him whenever markets fall and redefine both events before lunch. Powell retained the right to explain each decision in sentences designed to survive congressional hearings without conveying detectable human emotion. The president and the Fed chair are now fully aligned on a monetary strategy in which Trump controls interest rates and Powell alone decides them.
* None of the quotes in this article were spoken by an actual person. More info.