Trump Secures Commanding Lead Among Americans Who Disapprove of Him
President Donald Trump converted a 31 percent approval rating into decisive control of the nation’s least-popular-president market Monday, easily defeating every other active contender for the distinction. A national poll found 66 percent of Americans disapproving of Trump’s performance, while Democrats led Republicans by 12 points on the congressional ballot, giving the president what aides described as an unusually broad coalition of people eager to vote against whatever he recommends. Other surveys placed his approval between 33 and 36 percent, confirming durable support within the narrow statistical range separating a political emergency from a restaurant closure notice.
Trump hailed the results as proof that his comeback has more available space than any comeback in history. “These are tremendous numbers, because the lower you go, the more room you have to rise, and nobody has ever created this much room,” Trump said. “Lincoln had almost no room. Washington had no room at all. I have built room everywhere.” Republican officials praised the strategy of carrying fewer voters into the November midterms, noting that a lighter party should move faster once relieved of suburban families, independents, young adults, retirees and anyone who has purchased groceries since January. Campaign planners said they would shed additional electoral weight by emphasizing gasoline prices, food costs and the administration’s economic approval rating.
White House officials further explained that 31 percent constitutes a landslide once the remaining 69 percent are properly classified as Democrats, disloyal Republicans, suspicious independents, pollsters, journalists, coastal elites, inland elites and citizens exhibiting anti-presidential behavior by answering their phones. With Democratic enthusiasm rising and voters demanding change, Trump will campaign aggressively for Republican candidates nationwide, ensuring each receives the same professional assistance that reduced his own coalition to the seating capacity of a moderately successful chain restaurant. If his approval reaches zero before Election Day, officials noted, every remaining voter will be undecided by definition. Trump has therefore achieved total political dominance by eliminating the burden of public support.
* None of the quotes in this article were spoken by an actual person. More info.