Trump Condemns Fed For Reducing Inflation

President Donald Trump condemned the Federal Reserve on Monday for recklessly attempting to curb inflation through the obscure monetary technique known as curbing inflation. Trump objected after central bank officials kept borrowing costs elevated to slow spending and price growth, a policy the president described as hostile because it relied on economic data rather than his preferred benchmark, whether the numbers looked respectful enough.

“Inflation goes down when money is practically free, everybody knows that,” Trump said. “People borrow tremendous amounts, they buy everything immediately, and eventually prices get exhausted from going up. It is basic economics, probably beyond basic, maybe Wharton-plus economics.” The president demanded interest rates of 1% or lower, explaining that cheap credit would allow Americans to compete more aggressively for houses, cars and groceries until sellers became overwhelmed by prosperity and voluntarily lowered prices.

White House allies said higher borrowing costs could hurt homebuyers, businesses and consumers, proving that the Fed opposes all three groups. Lowering rates dramatically while inflation remains elevated might hurt the same people later, officials acknowledged, but by then consumers would be too busy refinancing jet skis to examine their grocery receipts. Administration economists added that conventional warnings about excess demand were developed before Truth Social became a leading indicator and therefore lacked the president’s more advanced system of capital letters, exclamation points and personal grievance.

Trump spared Kevin Warsh, his preferred central bank steward, from direct blame, saying Warsh had been overpowered by the radical institutional practice of officials voting unanimously after reading reports. The president instead faulted the broader Fed for refusing to recognize that the United States deserves the world’s lowest interest rates because it is the world’s best country, a connection long suppressed by arithmetic. Economists who warned that forcing rates down could reignite price pressures were dismissed as partisan operatives still clinging to the discredited theory that more money chasing the same goods raises prices. The White House has therefore established that inflation is caused by attempts to reduce inflation and cured by making everything easier to buy at once.

* None of the quotes in this article were spoken by an actual person. More info.