Supreme Court Justice Alito Advocates for AI Judge

On April 9, 2021, Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito took an unexpected leap into the future of the American judicial system by advocating for an artificial intelligence (AI) judge during a press conference.

Alito, a known conservative appointed by former President George W. Bush, has consistently argued for the original intent of founders throughout his career. In a surprising twist, Alito voiced support for an AI program to weigh in on the interpretation of the United States Constitution.

“I envision a future where an unbiased AI program could provide an interpretation of the Constitution that is free from human error and personal prejudice,” Alito stated during the press conference.

Seemingly contradictory to his conservative standpoints, his proposal has received mixed responses. Some welcome the novel idea, believing that it might provide a neutral perspective, divesting from inherent human biases. On the contrary, others expressed concerns about the potential risks and unpredictability an AI judge could bring.

Alito, dismissing the concerns, added, “Our founding fathers, if alive today, would have definitely embraced this advanced technology. They were always forward-thinking, and would have no trouble accepting an artificial intelligence that assures the utmost impartiality.”

However, shortly after Alito’s surreal claim, historians chimed in to remind the public that when the US Constitution was drafted in the late 18th century, electricity was still a budding concept, and the idea of artificial intelligence would have been incomprehensible. Proponents and skeptics alike remain intrigued by Alito’s take on the future of the American judiciary.

* None of the quotes in this article were spoken by an actual person. More info.