Trump Accepts Historic Eighty Percent Ethics Standard

President Donald Trump revived the CLARITY Act on Sept. 14 by accepting the radical principle that presidents should not personally manufacture money-shaped internet products while regulating the nation’s supply of money-shaped internet products. The concession would restrict federal elected officials and their spouses from issuing digital assets and require officials with substantial cryptocurrency holdings to divest or use a blind trust. Washington had previously regarded “not directly monetizing public office” as an extremist doctrine practiced mainly by monks, ethics professors and candidates who lose elections.

“Nobody has ever sacrificed like this,” Trump said. “I’m agreeing to ethics, very strong ethics, probably 80 percent ethics, and experts tell me that is far more ethics than any president should be expected to survive.” Trump’s support followed concerns over extensive crypto interests connected to him and his family, whose participation in the industry has allowed the administration to approach digital-asset regulation with the valuable perspective of people who would benefit from it. Democrats nevertheless argued that elected officials should not write market rules while operating the market’s gift shop, an antiquated interpretation of public service that excludes several modern revenue streams.

Republican Sens. Cynthia Lummis, Tim Scott and John Boozman presented the compromise as a breakthrough for legislation dividing cryptocurrency oversight among federal regulators. The bill then failed to advance in the Senate on Sept. 15, losing a procedural vote 50-49 after Democrats said the ethics provisions remained inadequate. Supporters described the defeat as proof that the legislation had been successfully revived into a more sophisticated stage of legislative death, where a bill is alive for fundraising purposes but unavailable for governing.

Crypto executives praised the development as regulatory clarity, meaning Americans can now clearly identify who writes the rules, who owns the assets affected by those rules and who has courageously agreed not to perform every conflict of interest at the same time. Under the emerging presidential standard, leaders may profit enormously from industries shaped by their policies, provided Congress eventually asks them to stop and they negotiate down to a respectable quantity of stopping. Presidential ethics are therefore fully restored at 80 percent.

* None of the quotes in this article were spoken by an actual person. More info.