Unexpected Map Unearthed by Capitol Insurgents
The Capitol rioters from January 6th have reportedly stumbled upon a map that allegedly leads to a location that experts previously believed had disappeared centuries ago.
“I discovered this ancient parchment while searching for Pelosi’s podium,” Richard Barnett, an Arkansas furniture restorer turned self-proclaimed explorer, admitted. “I believe it’s a map to Atlantis.”
The parchment is reported to hold detailed coordinates and descriptions that point to an undiscovered city beneath the sea, supposedly hidden within the very podium that Barnett is accused of pilfering.
Upon the announcement of this peculiar find, Senator Ted Cruz voiced his skepticism. “This is utter nonsense. Atlantis is a fable, a whimsical tale. It’s more probable to find Bigfoot strolling through the Capitol than a map to Atlantis.”
Despite the dismissive remarks, Barnett has swiftly formed a team of co-rioters to set out on a sea voyage in pursuit of the legendary city. The group has chosen the name ‘Patriots of Atlantis’.
Former President Donald Trump commented on the development during a recent interview. “I’ve often mentioned the hidden wonders in our Capitol. Perhaps this is what I was referring to. I wish them the best of luck. It’s going to be fantastic.”
The authenticity of the map and the reality of Atlantis are subjects of ongoing speculation.
* None of the quotes in this article were spoken by an actual person. More info.