Cruz Proposes Tax Code Extension
In a bold move, Senator Ted Cruz demanded consideration of tax reform on the Senate floor today, not for Texans or Americans, but for Martians.
“Why are hardworking Martians excluded from the American Dream?” questioned Cruz during his fervent address. His proposal, although unconventional, aims to broaden the scope of the United States tax code to include Mars.
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi responded to Cruz’s ambitious motion, remarking, “While Senator Cruz’s inventive approach is commendable, perhaps the focus should be on tax reform for Americans on Earth.”
Interestingly, the Martian population, according to every credible source, stands at a firm zero. This fact, however, did not dissuade Senator Cruz. “Our tax laws should be applicable to all Americans, regardless of their planetary residence,” he insisted.
Despite no known Martian-Americans, Cruz’s proposal has caught the attention of some of his peers. Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene voiced her support, declaring, “The discrimination against Americans based on their planetary habitat must end.”
However, skepticism surrounds the proposal due to the absence of Martian residents. Pelosi pragmatically observed, “We need at least one taxpayer on Mars before Martian tax reform can become a discussion.”
There’s no arguing the daring nature of Senator Cruz’s proposal. Yet, the question remains whether his efforts should be focused more on Earthly matters. For now, it appears Mars will continue to await its tax relief, as Pelosi concluded, “We are not there yet.”
* None of the quotes in this article were spoken by an actual person. More info.